Sick Waves
by ArtImitatesSex
Summary: Why didn’t he just tell her to go to hell to begin with? Because he had always held a soft spot in his heart for Kitty.Short Kyro story based on the song Bite to Break Skin by Senses Fail. Read and Review!


Sick Waves

**_(Eyes shot) from constant visions. (Angels) are rendered useless.  
Good has lost its heart. –"Bite to Break Skin"_**

The room was dirty and silent. When John walked into his small kitchen; he shivered as the cool air hit his bare chest. He walked over to his bare white refrigerator and took out a water bottle. As he stood there, alone and cold in his own apartment; he contemplated his current situation.

It had been almost two months since Alcatraz and things were a lot different now. He left the Brotherhood to start a clean life; to be his own person. He lived in a small apartment in Baltimore, Maryland; where no one knew him. He had started working at a small market down the street from his residence.

While he thought of all this; he also thought of her. About a month ago she had found him. She said she had looked everywhere for him after the battle and that Baltimore was the last place she thought to find him. But found him she had. At first he had pushed her away; but eventually she grew on him. While she spat out her theories on peaceful unity between humans and mutants, he politely listened. When he droned on and on about superior ideologies; she smiled and nodded her head. And when all was said and done; they made love. With the lights dim and the radio playing all of her favorite love songs.

Why didn't he just tell her to go to hell to begin with? Because he had always held a soft spot in his heart for Kitty. And when she had asked to spend the night in his bed the first night she visited him; why didn't he shut the door in her face? Because, in all honesty, he loved her.

But no matter how much he loved her, she couldn't make his demons disappear. Couldn't fade the scars that the Brotherhood left on his mind. No matter how much he wished she could.

John sighed and took another sip of his water and reached into the cabinet to his left. He pulled out a small transparent red bottle. Just as he dropped the white oval-shaped pill into his mouth, Kitty entered the kitchen. She was wearing a pair of mix-matched blue and orange socks, and an oversized white shirt that obviously belonged to John. She gave him a funny look.

"What are those?" She said as she reached his side. She took the bottle from his hand and read the label. John didn't meet her eyes, instead he concentrated on a stain in the wall; and he wondered how it got there.

"John, this is Vicodin. Why are you taking painkillers?" She asked, but he was still looking elsewhere. Kitty sighed and stood in front of him; so that all he could see was her. She lifted her hand to brush through his uncombed hair.

"John, come on. Don't give me the run around; just tell me what going on." Kitty said, quietly. She looked up to his stoic face to search for answers; but she found none.

"I've lost it." He said simply, his voice trembling. Kitty's eyes dropped with sadness. When she looked back up into his blue eyes, they were glazed over with tears. One fell down his cheek and she hurriedly wiped it away.

"Lost what?" She asked, even though she was afraid to know the truth. Finally, he looked at her. She watched him without blinking, even when he shrugged.

"My passion. He stole it. He took it all from me and now all I can do is try to kill the pain. Because if I don't, I feel…" John paused as he caught his breath. He looked into Kitty's concerned brown eyes. She was silently urging him on, knowing that when he was done; he would feel better.

"I feel empty." Another tear ran down his wet cheek. Kitty heart dropped. From the moment she met him again, he never let on any signs of these feelings. It caught her off guard and she was overwhelmed with the feeling that she had to fill all of the empty spaces in his mind; and his heart. In that moment, she knew the real reason behind why she went to look for him after the incident at Alcatraz. She had felt empty too, and when she thought of her emptiness; she wanted John.

Kitty looked down at the red bottle in his hand and took one more look into John's hurting eyes. She gave him an encouraging smile and walked over to a small white trash can in the corner of the kitchen. She threw the bottle in the trash and then walked over to John. His face still stoic and still. When she reached him, she laced her fingers around his and smiled widely at him.

"Not anymore." She said with her eyes shinning and bright. So bright that he couldn't help but smile down at her. He leaned forward and let his shaking lips brush hers.

For once, John Allerdyce felt truly at home. He let the pain in, and for once it felt fine.

The End


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